kkj You look into his eyes and feel butterflies forming in your stomach. His presence sends electricity through your veins that draw you closer to him and take you over the edge. You love him, he has your heart. However, is that really enough? If you really think about it, is he really the one who you’d want to stand with in the rain? More often than not we tend to settle for less than we deserve. We cling to people who don’t make us happy all in the name of love. Blinded by love, we get sucked deeper into an abyss that leaves us damaged when we eventually claw our way out. I’ve been there, done that. The most important lesson that I’ve learnt is the irreplaceable value of compatibility. Finding someone who blends well with every fiber of your being is the key to having a relationship that lasts a lifetime. Compatibility incorporates all of the following components.

Shared Interests

Unhappiness often comes from being with someone who doesn’t share your hobbies or think like you do. Your partner has to be someone you’d be willing to spend hours with engaging in activities and conversations you both enjoy. How are you going to spend a lifetime with someone who you can’t even enjoy being around?

Receiving Attention Without Asking

A person you’re compatible with will always want to talk to you and be in your presence. You don’t have to run after them like a lost puppy. Those people who have you begging for their attention often make you feel like a complete idiot because they’re annoyed by your calls. They make you feel as though something is wrong with your affection. Your compatible partner will relish your affection and endow you with the same or even more affection without you even asking.

Shared Beliefs

Let’s say that you think the sky is blue. If your partner is convinced that the sky is green and you’re a complete idiot then you’re going to face challenges in the future. A clearer example is a difference in religious beliefs. It is possible for a Muslim to love a Christian. However, what happens when they start to have children? What principles will they raise their children to believe? I am not saying that you and your partner will agree on everything. That’s impossible. However, your core beliefs have to be the same.

More than a Physical Connection

A couple has to be able to connect on more than a physical level. Each partner has to be able to stimulate the other intellectually and spiritually. Both partners in the relationship should be able to learn from and grow with the other. If your relationship is based on physical attraction, you are going to encounter problems in the future.


Strong Friendship

The best foundation for a relationship is a strong friendship. Good friends have been there for each other through thick and thin. They understand each other and tend to meet all of the criteria I’ve mentioned. Friends see each other at their worst and love each other regardless.


A strong relationship is one in which both partners are compatible. It has to be more than love. It has to be more than infatuation. Your partner has to be someone you want to build a life with, someone who blends with you so well that you can’t imagine building a life with someone else. Think carefully about these things before you decide to say “I do”.